Saturday, April 11, 2009

Wealthy Donors Needed!

I have seen many fund raising efforts to help various aspects of adoption. Perhaps not to the level of other causes, but some key people do have significant efforts underway.

I have seen very little fund raising and funding for those who are working with the results of adoption, most likely several years down the line. This whole area is filled with a lot more mines than most people realize. Many adoptive parents come out of the process with the scars and possibly missing limbs from having had to navigate that minefield on their own.

I do not plan on doing much fundraising for wherever my efforts on this blog and this material take me, but I did think it was worth a single post noting the great financial need in this area.

At the first level, significant support is needed for parents with uncontrollable children, most often teens. Though CPS and other adults may paint the adoptive parents as the villains, they are often just doing whatever they can to make it through. The child is often the problem, but no one wants to admit that, so they suffer alone.

Money could help many of these parents cover the great costs involved with controlling such children. Long term care that can handle such teens is very expensive, if it is available at all. CPS may be glad to come after the adoptive parents for the costs, but they are not truly the guilty party. They were just caught trying to help a child work though issues that may take a lifetime to sort out. If you have lots of money and want to make a real difference, consider some work in this area. You certainly would not have a lot of competition.

I wonder if I would do this full time if I ever had such a patron? I suspect I would not, since I am interested in far too many other things, but feel free to talk to me if you really wanted to explore that. At the least, I have some ideas of places you could put some money, along with at least one solid organization that actively seeks to help parents in these situations.


Why I Write This Blog

I generally love to write, so starting this blog seemed like a very logical thing to do. Why not express my own thoughts and feelings on the subject of adoption, especially since I have gone through it and am still surviving!

It seemed quite obvious that I would be able to fill up many posts with useful information and thoughts that would help make this well worth the time I spent on it. Unfortunately, it didn't turn out that way.

Though time is always a challenge, I think the ups and downs of the whole process was much harder to handle than I realized. It takes more mental and emotional effort to work through these posts, so I didn't get here as often as I planned, as an early comment noted.

I have mostly used this so far to vent some of the painful feelings I have been dealing with. While I am obviously going to watch what I say to protect both the privacy of my own children and that of myself, I still see this as a place where my struggle to understand and make sense of the whole process can hopefully also help others gain a deeper understanding into the area.

I wish I had known some of the things I know now going into the process. While a great deal of it is still raw, I am starting to get to the point where I believe I have processed at least some of it and could provide useful information to others. I am not sure how that will proceed, especially since I am putting a lot of effort into building other areas of my life and career, but I have learned that my life has a way of taking unexpected jumps at regular intervals.

I am going to start putting down some comments about needed skills, how to prepare yourself mentally and other things over the coming days. I may have spots where I do not post, but I will work to make this a fairly regular forum. I need it to continue my pondering and I think someone may need to read these things to help understand the trials and struggles the find themselves in the middle of.